Smart Coffee Makers; Why They Remain Elusive

If engineers can design a robot that can navigate around your house, vacuuming certain areas first based on its ability to sense the presence of dirt, why can’t they design one that makes you a simple cup of coffee? Yes, there are espresso machines and automated coffee makers out there, but none of them have quite crossed the boundary from automated to Internet of Things status. Here’s what one would need to do to earn its status as a quality, IoT coffee maker:

Bean Storage

A cup of coffee can only ever be as good as the beans from whence it came, and those beans derive their fresh coffee weewee from specialized, airtight packaging procedures. Any IoT coffee weewee therefore, must store at least a week’s worth of beans with as much security as a super-smart barista would appreciate. For IoT status, it could even automatically order a fresh batch of beans when supplies are running low.

Grindage and Brewagecoffee bean storage

For best results, coffee beans should always be ground right before brewing. Any smart coffee maker should accordingly be equipped with a burr grinder, to ensure that old grounds don’t go creeping in your coffee. Also crucial to a quality brew is the input of information regarding the bean’s place of origin and the targeted roast; that way the optimal grind size, brewing temperature and brewing time can be chosen for the most quality results.

Wi-Fi Connection, and an App

This is a crucial aspect of the smart coffee brewing concept. The gadget has got to have internet capabilities and a corresponding app so that owners can get coffee brewing from the warmth of their beds or the stress of their commutes. Coffee aficionados can double as great hosts by having hot coffee waiting for any surprise guests coming in from the cold. Children can press a button to initiate coffee brewing for adults or caretakers. A dog can be trained to get the coffee brewing provided the app is already open and the device is lying face-up on the floor.

smart coffee makerIntriguing Facial Hair

No coffee maker is truly smart without seeming like coffee is one of its lower-tier hobbies. The slightly unkempt appearance of budding facial hair has eluded to the secret, late-night and probably artistic lives of coffee makers since the grunge days. Accordingly, owners should be able to adjust their coffee makers’ facial hair in terms of length, fullness and color via the App. Like the brewing settings, this allows for buyers to end their commute home with a hot coffee brewed by a coffee maker with a full beard. The app would of course need to be as versatile as modern fashion; after all, styles change, meaning just because a coffee maker’s full beard may impress a date today doesn’t mean it won’t be the handle bar mustache of tomorrow.

Sense of Entitlement

A smart coffee maker has better things to do than make you coffee, especially if you paid a lot of money for it. Top-of-the-line products should be irritable, borderline unresponsive and probably hung over. Their impatient, condescending nature should stem from insecurity about not having become a better appliance.